rofl how unlucky?

[Bootz]

This is an accident report, which was printed in the newsletter of the British equivalent of the Workers' Compensation Board. This is the bricklayer's report, a true story. Had this guy died, he'd have walked away with a Darwin Award for sure!

Dear Sir:
I am writing in response to your request for additional information in Block _3 of the accident report form. I put "Poor Planning" as the cause of my accident. You asked for a fuller explanation and I trust the following details will be sufficient.

I am a bricklayer by trade. On the day of the accident, I was
working alone on the roof of a new six-story building. When I completed my work, I found I had some bricks left over which, when weighed later were found to be slightly in excess of 500lbs. Rather than carry the bricks down by hand, I decided to lower them in a barrel by using a pulley, which was attached to the side of the building at the sixth floor. Securing the rope at ground level, I went up to the roof, swung the barrel out and loaded the bricks into it. Then I went down and untied the rope, holding it
tightly to ensure a slow descent of the bricks.

You will note in block _11 of the accident report form that my weight is 135 lbs. Due to my surprise at being jerked off the ground so suddenly, I lost my presence of mind and forgot to let go of the rope. Needless to say, I proceeded at a rapid rate up the side of the building. In the vicinity of the third floor, I met the barrel which was now proceeding downward at an equally impressive speed. This explains the fractured skull, minor abrasions and the broken collarbone, as listed in Section 3 of the accident report form.

Slowed only slightly, I continued my rapid ascent, not stopping until the fingers of my right hand were two knuckles deep into the pulley. Fortunately by this time I had regained my presence of mind and was able to hold tightly to the rope, in spite of the excruciating pain I was now beginning to experience. At approximately the same time, however, the barrel of bricks hit the ground and the bottom fell out of the barrel.

Now devoid of the weight of the bricks, that barrel weighed approximately 50 lbs. I refer you again to my weight. As you might imagine, I began a rapid descent down the side of the building. In the vicinity of the third floor, I met the barrel coming up. This accounts for the two fractured ankles, broken tooth and
severe lacerations of my legs and lower body. Here my luck began to change slightly. The encounter with the barrel seemed to slow me enough to lessen my injuries when I fell into the pile of bricks and fortunately only three vertebrae were cracked.

I am sorry to report, however, as I lay there on the pile of
bricks, in pain, unable to move, I again lost my composure and presence of mind and let go of the rope and I lay there watching the empty barrel begin its journey back onto me. This explains the two broken legs.

[Cheez]

LOL. that had me sitting in my seat laughing my arse off :)

[Patch]

hahaahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah. but **** that must have hurt ;p

[Cabe]

seen it before, probably on darwin...

[Ruth]

Oh
My
God

OMG..i am reading this in the library and the poor bloke next to me must be wondering why i gasped, and then started to laugh loudly.....

They think im mad.....

Bliemy, that is an awful story. Is it real?

[Big Giant Head]

Dunno but I remember doing a near identical maths question about opposing forces using an identical example about 10 years ago ;)

[Say_Ten]

And I've heard it in the form of a comedy song years and years ago.

[Dwarf_Pr0n]

Originally posted by Cabe
seen it before, probably on darwin...

Yeah it's been in the Darwin Awards.

[wishy]

saw that on darwin ages ago. You aint lived since you've read a few of those :D

[Endor]

Very amusing.

No way can that be true, its just too stupid!

[Afty]

500 pounds is (mental calculation) somewhere around 200 kilos, which is about 2 and a half times what I weigh.

Now, assuming the guy unties that barrel, those 200 kilos will start to drop, accelerating at around 10 metres per second squared.

Let's assume that the guy manages to grab the rope after just one second, and attain the full grip with his fingers. We can discount the weight of the barrel for a bit, because it's clearly greater than him, so he has managed to grab hold of a rope travelling at 10 metres per second which is around 22 miles per hour. Imagine a car driving down your road, towing a rope - could you grab that rope, and hope to not burn your hands (reflex reaction is to let go) and hope to hold on and support your body weight?

Let's assume for the sake of argument (for the sake of his story we must) that he somehow loosed the bucket with one hand, while holding the rope with the other, and managing to keep hold as he accelerates upwards. His downward force is around a quarter of the buckets, so it only falls at 7.5 metres per second / per second of acceleration.

Now we'd really need a little bit of complex physics here to explain what comes next, so I'll approximate (you'll have to go with the flow here it we don't want differential equations) but the bucket will reach halfway down after about 2 seconds, and it will be travelling at around 11 metres per second. The brickkie is travelling in the opposite direction at the same speed. A combined closing speed of 22 metres per second.

Now, imagine you are holding onto a rope suspended still in midair. Someone drops an off-road motorcycle onto your from a height of 23metres (about 75 feet) - that's about three HOUSES up. Can you keep hold of the rope and avoid falling off? If it head your head would you be conscious to remember what happened next?


OK, I think we need not even progress to talk about the stresses placed on human bones and organs when falling from a height of around 65 feet onto a pile of broken rubble.

Quite clearly, poppy****. But amusing poppy**** that kept me amused for 10 minutes :)

[TelexStar]

hehe sorry to ruin everyones fun but this is'nt true! I heard this exact account in one of the Darwin awards except it was'nt a Brick layer, it ws a man who fixed some kind of power lines or other high up cabling thingy, and the man did in fact die by the end of it.

Sounds funny but it aint true - sorry :)

[D2M]

if it was true, i'd have liked to see what he looked like. He probably resembled tomato soup!!

[Afty]

Originally posted by afty
Quite clearly, poppy****. But amusing poppy**** that kept me amused for 10 minutes :)

Hmm, I appear unable to say poppycóck.

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[D2M]

rofl...care for some more spam?

[TelexStar]

mm yes please! is it on special offer? :D

[D2M]

yus buy one, get the whole fu*king stock room free!

[KermitTheFrag]

btw, cut and paste swearing from now on:-

fück
shìt
cünt
bòllocks

yay ... me happy.

filters ... 0wned :D

[TelexStar]

LOL

AYE u 0wned em' good :D

[D2M]

does it really matter tho?

[Cabe]

fück yes! I hate these shìt filters, they really get on my bòllocks.

sorry couldn't get cünt in oh yes i did in fact get it..........

[Gate`]

heheh that was so funny

but OWECH

[wishy]

Maybe there should be an I'm 18 and i've heard every world that your filters could possibly filter, now turn them off button on user profile

[Jarmin]

I wish i was there to see that **** have that barrel land on him :icon26:

Oh dont worry. I'm not evil or anything. I just love watching people breaking themself.

[Ruth]

afty....there was absolutly NO NEED for that!

/me shakes her fist at Russ in anger

[Riki]

Afty Dont Spam like that fs! 56k!!


+ Sayten the song is called Murphy and the Bricks i believe.