Mingtea Ski Trip Reports

[Mingtea]

Ski Trip Day 1

Todays Team: John (Mingtea) Jared (10acious) Stu (BGH) Rick (Sh0ckwave) Mat (Drarok) and Becca (Mats other half)

We rose early and in record time (1min) started discussing porn. After a slight semi and filling up on the usual croissants and pan au chocolates we proceeded to flee the chalet as quick as possible and catch the earliest lift possible.

As it was the first day boarding todays mission was to scope out the land and get the feel of the resort, after realizing I can still snowobard Jared learning to stay upright again (don't worry, he's good now) and Stu going too fast we decided the mission was to go to Les Moiters. Well, lets just say we got lost and this plan didn't work, after going down some decidedly dodgy flat runs the new plan was to go to Val Thorens which led us on some lovely, if knackering red runs there was some ice in the shaded areas but all in all the runs where highly enjoyable.

We had lunch up in Val Thorens, Tasty Spaghetti and a 3 euro 20 can of coke, (honestly for that price I was hoping to get sucked off) the mission was to get back to Les Menuires and die in the chalet while taking in some very enjoyable runs. We started with Becca being involved in a very amusing crash and (fortunately) not flying off the side of the piste (it was a close one however) After that we where all relatively upright and pr0 apart from Rick and Stu who where the pr0-est (honorable mention to Drarok but he's a skiier and nobody cares) we tackled the last blue into Les Menuires and my thighs both decided enough was enough and I was having FAR too much fun and the chalet would be the best idea, and proceeded to throw me down the slope.

In summary.

Stu - Pr0 boarder and leader of the pack, a challenged sense of direction but nobody is perfect.
Rick - Also Pr0 snowboarding sex machine
Jad - Got there in the end....
Mat - Gay Skiier
Becca - teehee
John - Just ace.

Bring on day 3, when my thighs have decided anyway.

[Mingtea]

Ski Trip Day 2

Todays Team: John (Mingtea), Stu (BGH), Phil (Bvark), Jared (10acious), Rick (Sh0ckwave)

Todays team was a snowboard only contingent led by Phil into the depths of the three valleys. The mission: to Courchavel, or near it at least, we set off torwards meribele and it was immediately evident that the slopes where nice and icy involving in my ass taking a very nice pounding, we pushed on taking a selection of reds and blues.

After arriving in meribele and taking in some horribly flat parts which involved more snow skating and snowboarding, the day was not looking so good it became even worse when we dropped out of meribele and had about 3km of flat terrain to navigate, I have to tell you the inconceivable thrill of gliding along snow at 3mph on an incline of 1 degree, absolutely amazing, suffice to say walking along a piste is not my idea of a great snowboarding holiday.

Things started to look up as soon as we found a downhill section and headed into courchavel, cutting off up some lifts to avoid the center of a very large resort. We glided along some very lovely pistes narrowly avoiding (or in some cases hitting full-on) patches of ice, again my ass took a lovely pounding as Phil and Stu dissapered into the sunset turning into mere dots as there super pr0 boarder skills led them to be much, much faster than me, Rick and Jad.

We then descended onto a rather high class restaurant which demanded a reservation even though it was about 1650m up on the mountain and the only access was by ski lift, it must have been called 'Bel-Air' for some reason, The food was pretty good, although i'm realizing my dislike for french feet tasting cheese, however it was much better than the narrowly missed 'Steak-tartare' which I conveniently forgot was uncooked steak "phew"

After lunch we decided to head back to Les Meniures via the button "snowboarders worst enemy" lift I narrowly hung on, however we lost some good men on that lift, Rick and Jad... and then there where 3. After a good wait at the top of the slope and some "well you better go the other way" phonecalls we pushed on back to Les Meniures. Keeping up with Phil and Stu was very hard but I felt myself getting faster and faster as time pushed on, scrubbing my speed less and less which was all well and good until.... I got lost and decided going back into the center of Les Meniures and missing the actual turn into the chalet was a fantastic idea.

Anywho it was a fantastic day and we're looking to enjoy the snow as much as we can because we're not sure how long it will last.

[Mingtea]

Ski Trip Day 3

Todays Team: John (Mingtea), BGH (Stu), Rick (Sh0ckwave), Jared (10acious)

Todays plan was one of fun, simply head to Val Thorens and session the board park for a bit, so we got up early and set off as soon as the lifts opened. After getting down to the telecabine we heard a shriek of "oh ****" from Jarred as in a fit of competence he left his lift pass in the chalet, Stu was tasked with a retrieval mission.

After waiting a good 30 mins for Stu to return and being passed by the late risers we finally made it into the telecabine onto the highest point of Les Meniures ready to descend into Val Thorens. We made our descent and it was obvious we where all on form and going horribly quickly, I was surprised how much speed I had gained over yesterday, this was simply down to having a few more balls and not scrubbing speed as much as I was. It was at this point that me and Stu claimed the first freshie pow pow lines of the day (well as fresh as it can be in these conditions) and took in some very inspiring off piste, meeting Jared and Rick with grins on our face.

We arrived in Val Thorens with a blank expression as we had no idea where we were going and where the hell the snow park was, Oh well, lets just pick a random lift and go up it, as we were elevated out of the resort we saw some crazy (porbably nordic) snowboarder leaping off a nice rock, after cheering him on I saw a crazed look through Stu's goggles as if to say "i'm doing that muthafukka." So we got to the top of the lift and started taking in some pretty off piste down to the rock drop of death. Stu thought about it for about 4 nanoseconds then dropped it like a bitch. On the other hand I wussed around for a second, checking it out listening to the heckles from the ski lift above then decided to bottle it in fantastic fashion.

It was at about this point Jarred and Rick pointed out the snow park and thus the track was set to the snow park of joy. We took a short chairlift and floated above it scoping out what kind of jumps we wanted to tackle today and how neither of us wanted to do the half pipe. After leaving the lift we dropped into the snow park for some pre-lunch fun. The first order of the day was a lovely kicker off to the side of the snow park and it was decided it should be taken down with extreme prejudice. I hit the kicker first adding my patented "Indy Tap" (not a grab) Stu cruised over in true pr0 boarder style, Rick glided through the air like a gazelle and Jarred did us proud soaring like an eagle. After a minor hike up it was picture time, Jarred decided to rest and become todays paparazzi hoping to make us all look lovely, Stu started off with again a very nice jump, I followed with what I think is the biggest indy grab i've done (but only the start was caught on camera :() Rick again glided amicably Jarred went up for another run but decided landing on his arse was the best idea.

Next in the snow park was a simple fun box which was claimed first by Stu who did a lovely kinked 5-0 over it, I gingerly slid over and Rick hit it with conviction, Jarred snapping all the way trying to make us look pro.

Stu had the great idea next of telling us to hit a simple box rail, Stu hit the first part of it but had to flee early, I wussed out and gave Debs her picture of me falling over and Rick joined me in the wussing out.

We then scoped out another relatively easy fun box and all I could see in Stu's eyes was "boardslide" So he rode into the depths of the jump and decided that pulling a 180 lie down air was the best idea, and it looked fantastic until he landed on his back, surprisingly still spinning, I counted 540 till he stopped, I slid over barely hanging on but maintaining maximum coolness, Rick again following closely behind.

It was at this point that we decided it was time for lunch, but only after I attempted a 180, which turned into the most amazing........ly dire 180 attempt ever and sliding down on my back was the only solution.

We got the lift over the moraine piste on our way to the restaurant for lunch, Stu scoped out a nice kicker off a rock which was in a nice area of off piste.

Again the order of lunch was to pay obscene amounts of money for a can of coke, and I introduced the french to the concept of cheesy chips "MORE FROMAGE DAMN YOU"

After lunch Jarred decided it was home time and that rest was a good idea (far too sensible) so we said our goodbyes and then there where 3. Me and Stu instantly dived into the off piste ready to scope out that rock kicker jump, again Stu threw convention out of the window and landed it straight away, AGAIN I wussed out and Rick wasn't even interested at that point. Angrily I also wussed out on the rock drop again, this drop was looking to be a lost cause.

We decided that heading up this lift another 3 times would be a great idea so AGAIN we arrived at the rock kicker and this time THIS TIME I hit it and OH MY GOD I landed it, adrenaline flowing through my body and flying down back to the rock drop I had visions of grandeur however again I decided that wussing out was the best option but I decided that the 1 out of 2 was better than nothing at all so I was rather happy.

Last time up the same lift and down the same great piste Stu decided that hiking up the hill and and hitting some fresh pow pow would be a great idea, however whenever I hear the word hike I immediately adopt the fetal position and cry to myself. But as I saw Stu climb that mighty hill I decided I could not let whatever limited amount of powder we have go, so I followed. After having a mild heart attack at the top of the hill I recomposed and we called rick to assure us that no rocks where waiting to destroy us, after a good news report Stu glided lovingly through the powder claiming a lovely line through the pow pow, I followed traversing behind and creating a great homage to the snakes on a plane logo, but as always gliding through fresh powder is what snowboarding is all about and it really made the day for me, linking some lovely turns and kicking up lots of lovely snow, aah this is what snowboarding is all about. We met with rick at the rock kicker again I glided over getting some lovely air, however almost broke my knee wreck of a landing, and behind me Rick decided that we were having far too much fun and that he must join us in tackling the snow kicker of doom, and he cracked it with finesse, at this point we where all VERY chuffed and decided to head home.

On the run into Les Meniures we decided to engage in this seasons hottest sport 'Ice Boarding' Stu quickly learned that freestyle is not a discipline that is accepted in the world of Ice boarding, as I titterd leaving him behind.

Today has probably bee one of the best days of the trip, with many highs and a few lows but definitely progression and fun where the key words of today.

The perfect end to the day was beers in the hot tub, hell yeah!

[her0n]

Memories of the jump session last year come flooding back :')

Well, memories of me being a big wuss, and killing living up to his name on a grind box thing :p

Tommy was mocking me earlier.. :(

http://img296.imageshack.us/img296/6705/tommyunluckycp2.jpg

[Karsh]

Woh a long read but good one! :) Sounds like so much fun.

[Mingtea]

Ski Trip Day 4

Todays Team: John (Mingtea), BGH (Stu), Rick (Sh0ckwave), Jared (10acious)

The mission today was to relax, have fun and hit the board park, So again we made our way to Val Thorens to hit the mighty fine board park. After making our way to the telecabine and taking out 3 or 4 skiers on the way we shot up the mountain ready to make the descent.

At the top of the mountain we decided to take in some of the off piste on the side of the run into Val Thorens this was a decision that reintroduced us to the wonderful sport of ice boarding, who would have known it had an off piste discipline? Anyway after skating along the side of the mountain and hearing my board scream in pain again and again we dropped into some nice freshie (narrowly missing the sink hole on Stu's advice) "You wont enjoy it, and i'll be pulling you out" "Just make sure you drag me onto the piste to avoid any insurance irregularities" I commented.

We then engaged warp factor 10 down into Val Thorens ready to get the lift to above the board park and maybe engage in a bit of half pipe fun
(Note: Next time nunchucks required for Road Rash fun through the resort and skier etiquette lessons.)

Ayway, whoosh up the lift then hardcore speed into the board park ready to tackle the half pipe.......... which was half closed, boohoo :( (but secretly YAY NO DEATH.) This was a slight setback but it didn't mean we'd miss out on shooting off (teehee) a lovely kicker or two. We got to the top of the park surrounded by gnarly dudes making us all feel old and far too uncool (apart from me, asteroids snowboard pants say a lot about a person and make me 200% cool.) Stu setup to take the jump first and took form off eagle to soar into a successful landing, I followed trying to better my speed to height ratio and hucked off the jump making a lovely indy grab in the middle (which was missed on camera AGAIN.) Jarred followed and clearly wanted to either kick us all in the face or desperately wanted us to see the bottom of his board as he tried some kind of half backflip type affair, Rick was bringing up the rear with an adequate jump for all to enjoy.

It was at this point we decided that our bums where getting cold and we should make our way back into the valley to return to Les Meniures for a spot of lunch, we spotted a lovely line which involved a nice fun box and a cool little transfer. Stu set off with maximum style and kicked the fun box and hoped over the tranny with grace and finesse, I followed but with the grace and finesse of a tower block being destroyed kinked the fun box finished arse first then took the tranny with a fabulous 180 spin on my back.

Before going to Les Meniures we decided to go down our favorite moutiers run, but missing out the rock drops and kickers because we where clearly far too unfit to do it, Stu persuaded us to take another lift further up the slope and identified some lovely untracked powder and then a nice black run to get there..... oh yay. Rick and Jared wussed out and went for the easy option which required walking, me and Stu went on to tackle the black run, a million insults to skiers went through my head as I tackled the moguls and got heckles from the (probably skiers) above on the chairlift, we found the powder dropped of the side only to be greeted by our new favorite sport, alpine ice boarding! Now let me make it clear that while gliding through fresh powder is quite possibly the most wonderful experience you can have while keeping your dangly bits in your pants, sliding across a sheet of icy snow is the equivalent of getting sodomized by the very board you are riding.

After all that fun we met Rick and Jared at the base and went straight back to Les Meniures for a fine lunch at the great l'igloo pub. After a downing a large bottle of Erdinger Stu felt he was on for the board park, after ensuring he was at least a little bit sane we pushed on leaving our cute snow ninja Jared behind. We got back to the park to hit a few more lines an met up with Phil. The line was simple and was the same one we had done this very morning. Style it up the kicker, down the side, over the fun box and hop over the tranny. all parties hit the jump amicably and I surprised myself by actually completing the box and kicker with some style still intact! on this buzz we truly had to go to the top and try it all again. Stu flew over the kicker with good style, but Phil decided he wanted to do a double corkscrew however the planets had not aligned quite correctly and it was decided he should land on his arse. The loudest obscenities ever was screeched setting off a small avalanche up the mountain and we believe killed several nordic all mountain boarders named Klaus... all we had left where the grizzly beards :(

After ensuring all where ok and that pride was intact we shot off back home and proceeded to engage warp factor 11 taking down many skiers in our jet stream, because when you hear the hot tub calling you have to answer with "****ING GET ME HOME NOW MR SULU"

[Silk75]

With the obvious exception of Pingman, Killing and Drarok, is there anyone else skiing on this holiday?

[Baroness]

Vark?

[Aardvark]

I'm flitting between groups, I may feature in a future report if I get up early enough :p

[Karsh]

I'm flitting between groups, I may feature in a future report if I get up early enough :p

Lazy so and so !

[Mingtea]

Ski Trip Day 5

Todays Team: John (Mingtea), Stu (BGH), Jared (10acious), Rick (Sh0ckwave), Mat (Drarok), Becca (Mats SO)

Today started as many have with the definitive phrase "Val Thorens snow park?" this phrase often fills me with both excitement and sheer terror, in equal measures. Again we head out at dawns fine crack and head off to the snow park before this however, we had to make a few slight detours.

Detour one was for me to decide that going fromm full speed to zero about 2ft behind Stu and penetrating him at terminal velocity was a good idea and Detour two was to get some new gloves as it seemed that the lovely off piste runs we were doing yesterday left a sizable hole in my gloves. A few short minutes, 90 euros and a sore cock later we were off.

Making our way down into Val Thorens we observed Stu's uber off piste skills from a distance as I wussed out (but clearly wished I didn't). We ducked and weaved our way down the slope and got annoyed at the flat bits where we wished for ski poles (but not for skis that would just be gay) as Becca and Mat cruised past, it was ok though, we got them on the down slopes.

We made our way straight to the snow park ski lift, noticing that somebody obviously proud of their home town wrote 'Rotterdam' in the snow and somebody else not so proud wrote '****' above it, one has to admire the politics of writing things in the snow and how snow phalluses represent all that is good in the world.

Here we sat again waiting to drop into the snow park kicker to do some lovely moves again (or in my case, repeat the same indy air I had been doing all week, i'm such a wuss with spins, i'll never be a park kiddie.) Becca was not up for jumps so she elected to be paparazzi while we strutted our stuff of the jump. Stu soared off with a very sexy method, Rick did his signature 'Eagle Air' again, Jared just aired but with much improved technique and I indy aired again however this time it was caught on camera! (yaaaaaaaay)

With a few successful runs off the kicker in hand we decided to hit a few more jumps down the slope. taking in the transition jump again where I almost did a fantastic snow cartwheel after nose diving into the landing like a drunken Ryanair pilot, the real star was Jared who managed to do the jump for the first time, we admired his conviction and his wrists thanked him (but we think masturbation may be out for the next few days Stu will step up to the plate though.)

Time to leave the snow park and it was at this time we noticed that the great gods had decided to pile drive us up the wrong un and had served us up a most fantastic ice mogul field in which to traverse, most of us made it through.... MOST of us that is, me Stu, Mat and Rick cruised down to the lift only to be greeted by the dreaded phone call. "Becca has hurt herself" oopsie! Time to go back to the base of the snow park, we commenced hiking towards the wreck of people, on arrival we noticed a rather uncomfortable Becca Jared, who was following Becca informed us of the majestic flight that Becca had just engaged in, apparently she didn't care much for the piste netting and decided to redecorate by taking some of it out and putting a nice bend in one of the poles all this while doing a double corkscrew to head grind. Suffice to say we were all impressed. Stu engaged captain sensible mode and got the lift pass office to radio us a human ski ambulance (a ma that drags a stretcher) after seemingly poking her leg in some kind of sick pain fetish he got her off the piste and into an ambulance. After collecting our thoughts for our fallen comrade we pressed on.

(Now at this point your irony detectors should be on overload because you may have noticed that Becca had not done any of the jumps in the snow park but managed to destroy herself just coming out of it, the world is a funny place you know.)

At this point we did what anybody else would do after watching somebody get hurt, go back to the snow park! after cruising through all the jumps amicably again the bottom of the piste tried to claim another victim by making me and Stu play destruction derby with each other leading me to do a rather impressive front roll, well with this in mind it HAD to be time for lunch.

During lunch we made the obligatory phone call to Mat to check on Becca only to be informed that Becca had in fact broken her leg! Well with that in mind we only had one thing to do, spill a bottle Erdinger for our fallen homie, sob sob :(.

After lunch the day looked to take a turn for the worse the snow park was packed with people far too cool for us, and that was clearly indicated by me completely fluffing up a jump and my arse getting far too friendly with the floor, shockingly for a few minutes I actually thought I was in jail and had in fact just dropped the soap after rocking backwards and forwards for 3 minutes crying to myself about how Bubba the professional prison sodomizer had just violated me, I pressed on to hit more jumps with a complete lack of style being outclassed by all present as I slid down the landing of the jump I my back we all decided to call it day and head home.

On the way home it appeared Stu had stolen Mr Sulu from me and shot off like a fat kid after an ice cream truck (or just Stu after a beer) and I gingerly made my way back to the chalet ready to take the piss out of an injured Becca (but not nearly as much piss as Mat would be taking, ah how we love him.)

What a day.

[Karsh]

Oh my!, I hope Becca will be fine. :(

[Silk75]

Nice to see the game of ridicule the casualty is still running

[Mingtea]

Ski Trip Day 6

Todays Team: John (Mingtea), Stu (BGH), Jared (10acious), Rick (Sh0ckwave), Steve (Killing), Iain (Pingman), Peter (Lazyboy), James (Ryvita)

Today was a big team with everybody willing to see 'team boards' leet skills in action. So again we made our way to the Val Thorens snow park, at this point I must tell you for the last few days all we've had to do is stay in the snow park, with the high temperatures and and thin snow covering we decided that making use of the snow earlier in the week and staying at the snow park for the later part of the week. It seems to have worked in our favour as our descent into Val Thorens was a treacherous one with ice and skiers trying to throw us into the snow, we really wouldn't want to be spending all day on the slopes in these kind of conditions.

As we made our way into Val Thorens me and Stu decided to cut off and take on the off piste section one more time, as I slid over the icy popular slope I fell over more than a few times and this didn't do great things for my mood, I was literally on the edge of throwing my snowboard off the piste when eventually (tailbone damaged) I made it to the lovely powder, me and Stu carved our way through looking like pro's before I got to the bottom and cried my eyes out over my destroyed tailbone.

We made our way into the board park and Stu decided it would be a good idea to hit the half pipe this time around, well not wanting to be left out of this little bit of fun I decided to give it a go and well, this being my first time on a half pipe it was comical at best, I actually heard Shaun White laughing from his ice palace in america, ah well there was a first time for everything, Stu did pretty well the first time, not making it over the lip but at least staying on.

As we got to the top of the park we noticed that our favorite kicker had turned into a block of ice and had been corded off by the elite piste police. We selected another kicker and pressed on down the slope, we all hit the jump in a shaky way, with both me and rick decided that going off the slope horizontally would be a fantastic idea, Peter used his snowboarding exoskeleton to his advantage and hucked off the jump as fast as possible.

We met up with Iain and Steve again (they tried to avoid us by going through the snow park twice, gits) to shoot some lovely videos of us destroying ourselves off the jumps. We made our way to the top of the snow park again where me a Stu both made a much better effort getting down the half pipe (I may have even had some style, and Stu may have cleared the lip!) and cruised our way into the jump where we all made a much better effort of it and it was even captured on glorious video this time, we made our to the transition for everybody to sail over amicably apart from peter who decided going as fast as possible and not actually landing was the best option for him, see when you have a master chief style halo suit on who cares about actually landing? but we all admired his balls, and we like big balls.

It was about now where we decided it was time for lunch and at lunch we picked up two undesirables Russ (Afty) and James (Aardvark) ready to rock back to the board park, just after Stu decided to spring his leet skills on us again and did the rock drop even though it had about a nanometer of snow on it, what a guy I swooned.

As we made our way back to the board park I fell over while trying to get round a corner, after screaming out in pain because my tailbone took a pounding I tried to suppress the tears and make my way to the others but this pain signaled the end of my time doing jumps, that was it I was afraid.

I watched the others descend through the board park everybody doing conservative, good jumps apart from Peter who engaged no fear mode and flew through the air landing maybe 50% of the time, but he looked mightily impressive in the air, and that's all that maters when it came to the pictures.

We quickly tired and decided we may as well get home to end a fair day of boarding where we all seemed to get cut up by people and get frustrated over silly patches of ice.

All in all the holiday was a fantastic one, with some great company, some great days boarding and some fantastic meals prepared by the group. The chalet was in a fantastic position and even though it didn't exactly have the best maintenance record I think the ski in ski out aspect won us all over, oh and the hot tub was also a bonus.

Today finished with team board (Rick, Jared, Me and Stu) In the hot tub with a fine bottle of 11 euro champagne, you cant get any better than that :)

[bvark]

good reports. we now need a column.

[Aardvark]

Work shall commence shortly, I am as they say 'on it' :D

[Silk75]

Work shall commence shortly, I am as they say 'on it' :D

So June then?

[Aardvark]

You're just grouchy because you didn't get to come ;)

[Silk75]

True, but if a column gets made before June, then the planets would have all aligned or something cosmic like that would have happened

[Mingtea]

LEEEEEEWHOOOOOOOOOOOSSSSSSSSEEEEUUUUURRRRRRRRRRRRRR

[bvark]

Trespass Fleece - Black (ish), Large.

With me, scream if it's yours.

[sh0ckwave]

Photos to match up with the reports...
http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2456&l=64464&id=657095570

Theres some vids sitting with K and i think Drarok/Becca have some too?

[Groodles]

With the obvious exception of Pingman, Killing and Drarok, is there anyone else skiing on this holiday?

I was there, but am just a padwan when it comes to boarding skills. This will hopefully be rectified for next year.

Oh yes, I'd like to reserve my place for next year right NOW!

[WhiteShadows]

Hey, It's Becca. Just want to say thank you so much to everyone who looked after me. Having a bit of trouble with doctors at the moment. Two seem to think my knee is fractured while the actual doctor that treated me, after 5 hours of waiting in A&E, didn't. He told me there was a a build up of blood in and around the joint so took out about 200ml of it with the help of my mum. Yeah, he said he couldn't be bothered finding a nurse as it would take too long. Going back to hospital tomorrow to ask for a second opinion.
EDIT: Have some photos, will pass them onto Drarok soon.

[Aardvark]

God bless the NHS. Sigh.

Anyway get well soon little broken lass! :)

[Baroness]

Glad y'all back home safe and sound-ish (hope you're not feeling too crap, Becca).

Have seen some of the photos and vids and you all look very pr0 - trust a good time was had by all :)