Happy Birthday <Insert Name Here>

[Wise Washu]

There you go, another year older. How does feel being <Age>? Hope you got that <Present> you wanted. Hope you get to drink as much of that <Beverage> you love.

And don't drink too much as we don't want to have to spend the rest of the day hiring a <Proffession> to save you from the <Object> that you got attached to. Oh and please return the <Toy> you borrowed off me.

[WhiteKnight]

Indeed, congrats <insert name here>. Another year older and all that :D

[Unplugged]

Happy Birthday <insert name here>.

Dont do anything I wouldent do ;)

[Boffykins]

DING! You're now a Level <Age> <Your Profession>! Gratz! Hope you got a screenshot of you doing that <Embarassing Act>

[Elbonio]

Many happy returns <name>!

I'm sorry I <adultery> your wife, and did her in the <orifice> . She'll be fine once the bleeding stops and im sure that <young relative> didnt see much when she walked in.

Whilst I remember your <embarrasing problem> situation was brought up in our last church prayer group. We all prayed that in future you wont spray as much when in <high street retailer> next time.

Anyway happy birthday, and dont forget to return the porn films to the store on <day>.